Food for Thought

Some thoughts on meals and snacks.

1. Meal Plan: and utilize items you have on hand. This can be tricky and takes some practice and dedication. I am great at meal planning, but not always great at following through with said meal plan. Sometimes I plan for meals and don't feel like cooking or eating them and hate that my fresh ingredients may go bad before I get a chance to use them. If you struggle in this area consider meal plans that contain freezable or non-perishable ingredients.

2. E for Effort: Understand that your kids are just as excited about "Cereal Sunday" and hot dogs as they are about homemade spaghetti and meatballs. I love to cook, but sometimes I don't have time for an elaborate meal. Besides, they've never been more excited about a meal than when the pizza delivery guy rings the doorbell. 

3. Marketing matters: My kids don't like pretzels, but they LOVE to eat the ones that are shaped like letters. Same thing with cheese crackers vs. Goldfish crackers. Pay the extra money for the snacks they will actually eat. Consider this option with presentation. Sometimes taking a few minutes to cut food into shapes or smaller pieces is all it takes for picky eaters to change their minds.

4. Speaking of picky eaters: I make one meal and my kids are required to eat some of it. I am not a short order cook. However, if I am making something for the main course that I know is either not their favorite or may not be well received, I make sure I stick to favorites on side dishes. They do not have to eat all of it but the bonus if they make a "Happy Plate*" is they get dessert.

5. Rewards: Food can be an incentive, but shouldn't be the only incentive. For example, if my kids are having a great day, I will offer a special dessert. They are allowed to make special requests for meals. And when my son was having trouble with table manners I gave him the incentive of, "If you can go this entire meal without opening your mouth with food in it, I will make you whatever you want for dinner next week." It worked.

6. Snacks: If you have little ones who always seem to want a snack right before dinner and you are worried about them ruining their appetites try giving them a portion of their meal as a snack. I suggest the vegetables. If they want them, they usually are legitimately hungry, if not they are probably bored or just want a sugary snack. My daughter loves snacks and could care less about an actual meal. For a time we had to forgo snacks because she was snacking so much that she didn't want to eat her dinner. It only took one day of this to get her back on track. Also, if they really want the snack you can leave it on the table during the meal and say that they can have it after they eat a good dinner.

7. Leftovers: No one in my house really likes to eat leftovers (including me). My aim in cooking is to either leave no leftovers or make enough to stretch out two meals. You don't always have to double a recipe if your children are small or lighter eaters. If you have the space freeze the extra meal if you don't consider sharing the meal with another family or a hungry college kid. 

8. Mealtime = Family time: We eat every dinner at the table and we turn off the tv. My husband and I didn't grow up doing this and it was important to us that our children would have memories centered around the dinner table. However, one of my kid's favorite things to do is have a "Party Tray Picnic" I get a party tray from the deli, carrots, apples/grapes, or other fun finger foods and we spread out a blanket on the living room floor. We watch movies or play games and eat off of paper plates. It's a great bonding time and clean up is a snap!

9. Healthy Habits: Prepare a variety of fruits and vegetables and healthy options for your children because no one else will! If I can teach a 4.5YO who had never really seen vegetables to like them, you can too! Keep trying because kid's pallets change. If you have to you can resort to adding cheese, dips, bribes, etc ;)

10. Cooking = Teaching: I understand this is harder for working moms and on busy weeknights, but I try to include the kids when I am cooking and use this time as teaching/bonding moments as age appropriate. Little ones can count/measure ingredients and stir, they can also set the table, pass out napkins and take their dishes to the sink, or sweep up crumbs after the meal. 

11. Rules are made to be broken: One of my favorite things to do during the summer is to have ice cream for dinner. We have a big lunch and a late snack (that is really dinner), then at dinner time we go out for ice cream. The kids love this and look forward to it every summer. Sometimes I let them have "dessert" first or for breakfast especially if it's a fruit and veggie smoothie. To them it's dessert and it is a fun treat. 

What are some of your favorite tips and tricks?

*A Happy Plate isn't necessarily a clean one. I tell my children to listen to their bodies and if they feel full they can stop. However they only get dessert if they have made a good effort to have tried all of the food and to eat a good balance of their meal. 

Fruits of My Labor

I had to give a tiny lecture to my kids about kindness at the store today. The gentleman in the aisle with us smiled and said, "I hope I'm looking into my future, my wife just had twins! You're doing a great job!" Very sweet. I told him thank you and added, "It will be difficult, then it will get easier...then it will get difficult again, because they are constantly growing and changing! But, it will always be worth it!" I then congratulated him and wished him and his wife luck and we went on our way.

As we were checking out the cashier remarked about how kind the kids were and even gave them extra "Buddy Bucks" to put in the sticker machine. She said, "Wow, they are so well behaved and adorable! I'd love to come visit at your house I bet they are fun!" And she was right, they are! 

They are super fun and wonderful and sometimes they are crabby and difficult and that's ok too. We all have bad days and we are entitled to them.

I do not often get to see the fruits of my labor as a parent, but today in the time it took to select cereal to the time it took to checkout, I saw change in my kid's kindness and I consider that a win!

It reminded me of the children that we fostered in between our children being reunified with their biological mom and returning to our home. We had two young boys "Paul" age 3 and "Toby" age 15 months. Paul and Toby had special emotional needs that made it very difficult to parent them, especially after our children returned home. 

We had 5 children all under the age of five! Four of them were in diapers and two had special needs, to say it was challenging is an understatement! We did our very best to love and teach them in the time that we had with them. Thankfully, they had a family friend who was willing to care for them until they could be reunified with their biological parents so they went to that placement after being in our care for only a few months.

William and I tried very hard with these children, but we were never able to bond with them. On the very last day we had them Toby finally smiled at and hugged William. It was bittersweet. We sent them off to their new home not knowing how they would turn out or if their parents would ever regain custody of them.

By odd coincidence one day William happened to see Toby and his mother walking into the tax office. We were excited because that meant that we now knew that they were reunified! By even odder coincidence my friend who had done respite care for Toby and Paul saw who she thought to be Toby and his mother at the WIC office. She stealthily took a secret picture to show me and to make sure that it was indeed Toby, and it was! She remarked that Toby seemed to be developmentally/emotionally "normal" and it made me cry tears of joy.

I have often struggled with my thoughts about these boys and worried for them and prayed for them hoping that they would have happy and normal lives and that they would get to be reunified with their parents. The not knowing had weighed heavily on my heart, but God decided to grant me peace by arranging these odd "coincidences". 

Today, I got to see the "payoff" with my kids and it was awesome. More than likely though, there will be times in all of our relationships where we will have to wait for it, or even more likely times where we will never get to see it. But, remember that just because you won't see the payoff, doesn't mean that you shouldn't make the investment. 

One Month Fitness Update

It's been a month (ok, like one day short of a month) since I posted this message saying that I was going to try to get fit.
I am happy to report that after a month of moving around a little more and eating a little less, that I am down 7lbs! 

I think this is reasonable considering I am not trying very hard and I am not doing much cardio--and considering I've eaten cake everyday since my birthday--and considering that yesterday I had donuts. 

If I had to math (please don't ever make me math) I'd guestimate that's around 2lbs a week which is perfectly healthy rate of loss and that is acceptable to me.

I didn't take any measurements, so I don't know how many inches I've lost...but when in doubt aren't you supposed to say 7 inches? So, I've lost 7 inches.

I will locate my tape measure and do measurements for next month. 

My fitness goals for the next month are to add cardio to my routine 3 days a week and to hopefully shed a few more pounds.

I still have no idea what my goal weight/size will be yet.

How's it going for you?

Tiny Dancer

When I was a little girl, I dreamed of being a prima ballerina. I loved the beautiful costumes, glamorous make-up, satiny shoes and yes, the sparkling tiaras. Sadly, I never got to be a ballerina. My older sisters were already enrolled in martial arts and my parents did not want to juggle taking six kids to and from several different activities. Much to my chagrin, most of my youth I wore a karate gi, in lieu of a tutu. 

M has always loved music and dancing. I thought it would be a great idea to live vicariously--I mean, to nurture her passion by enrolling her in dance class. However, what I didn't count on was how different dancing in our living room is verses dancing in a classroom or on a stage. Some days M is super excited to see her friends and to dance, but the majority of the time she leaves crying without so much as stepping a foot into the dance studio. After several months and several hundred dollars, we have decided that we will not pursue dance until she shows more interest and she is a little bit older. My beautiful baby girl will not be a dance prodigy (well at least not this year) and I'm okay with that.

I feel like we gave it an honest try and that it was something she was interested in, but just not ready for. She was excited about dance and would ask about when we were going to dance and if we were going to see her friends, etc, but I think actually being there was a little overwhelming to her. I was slightly annoyed because we would get up early, get dressed, pick up F early from school, drive all the way out to dance class, and then M would freak right out and we'd turn around and drive home. I think any parent would be at least a little annoyed. 

Today as we were driving home I asked myself the following:

What is the harm in waiting another year or two to see if she is even interested?

Does it really matter if the recital and costume fees are nonrefundable?

Do I keep pursuing something that does nothing but frustrate all of us?

Am I doing more harm or good to my daughter by asking her to rise to an occasion that she may or may not be ready for?

Immediately my thoughts shifted to one question: In the long run, what matters most to you as a parent for your child and where does this fit in?

Wow, that really put things in perspective. Dance class has nothing to do with my long term parenting goals, but here I was letting a single event determine my mood for the rest of the day. 

As parents I think that we get so wrapped up in the day to day, that we forget that we are working towards a much greater goal. I know I am to make sure my kid's basic needs for things like food and shelter are met, that they are safe, that they know they are loved,etc. but ultimately, it is my job as a parent to prepare my kids for adulthood. Do I really want M to grow up to be a ballerina or I am more concerned with capturing her heart so that she will be a good person? 

One Year Famiversary

On Saturday we celebrated our One Year Adoption Day Anniversary or Famiversary as it's known in the adoption community. It is so amazing to reflect back on our journey and to see that already a year has passed. Some days William and I will just look at each other and smile. We both know that the other is thinking, "I can't believe we get to be their parents!"
We endured much heartache to arrive here, but they are worth it!
We are grateful to all of our friends and family who shared in this journey with us and who continue to pray for our family.
We are looking forward to celebrating many more Famiversaries and are excited to see what the future holds.

National Princess Week

I've always felt that my head was perfectly shaped to wear a tiara. In fact, up until about five years ago if you asked me what I wanted to be, my answer was always "a princess." Sadly, the closest I ever got to being a princess was dressing up as Mulan for the DVD release at the grocery store I worked at in high school. Though, at the time I don't think Mulan was really classified as a "princess" in terms of Disney branding. 

When I read an announcement that April 22nd-28th the first annual National Princess Week, I practically squealed with excitement. I understand that I am no longer "princess material" but the way I see it, the next best thing to being a princess, is having one--specifically, my daughter M. 

Let me just state for the record that I am the biggest girly girl and much to my delight, M is just like me. She loves pink or "peent" as she calls it, clothes, shoes, jewelry, and princesses. Specifically The Disney Princesses. M really doesn't discriminate, she loves Ariel, Rapunzel, and Princerella--I mean Cinderella. Though, if she had to pick a favorite, I think she would choose Belle. 

Glancing around M's room I noticed that she has amassed quite a Disney Princess collection. She has many of the 12 inch character dolls, the pop-up tent, dress up clothes, and a tea set, but I believe the prize possession in her collection is her Princess & Me Belle. And who could blame her? Belle is a beautiful doll and she is the perfect size/weight to carry around to tea parties. They only complaints I have are that her hair is super soft/fine and easily tangled. I have avoided problems with her hair by not taking out of her factory style and then fashioning her hair in a loose up do...this may not work for the girls who like to play beauty shop though. Also, she is a bit pricey, but I feel that for the money Belle is a beautiful keepsake and more of an appropriate toy for M than other similar 18 inch dolls. 

Final Rating on Disney Princess & Me 18 inch Doll is Splurge! 

*Photo credit www.toysrus.com

I may never get to be a princess, however, I did marry my version of Prince Charming. And of course, on that day, I did wear a tiara. 

**Photo credit Summer Stone Photography

Shopping Product Rating System

As I said, I will be rating products from time to time and will be using the following Shopping Product Rating System:

Spend: This item is reasonably priced and you should not think twice about spending the money on it.

Splurge: This item is a little on the pricey side, but worth the additional cost compared to less expensive items

Save: This item is a bargain and great alternative to a pricey product.

Skip: This item is not worth any of your money, don't even go there.

Happy Shopping!